Showing posts with label Steven. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Steven. Show all posts
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Question of the day
19 year old son pees in the kitchen garbage can in the middle of the night. This is witnessed by 11 year old who got up to see the sunrise (huh?). My question: Is this a manifestation of his mental illness or is he just a freaking idiot?????
CUP, do not answer this, I already know what you are going to say!
CUP, do not answer this, I already know what you are going to say!
Friday, July 3, 2009
Steven's fashion statement
A close up of his Ghostbusters Belt. This belt used to be Drew's when he was 3 or 4 years old. I can't believe it fits Steven!
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Rage Central
Well, more like mini tantrum central, actually. This morning, everything was off to a great start. I was straightening Hannah's hair and Mike was chilling in the family room with us, while he waited for Jack to get home from work with his car, so Mike could drive up to DC for work. We were having fun and joking around. Mike eventually left and Hannah went out to the car with him to bring in the coffee grounds that he had brought home from work on Thursday. They are for my compost pile. When Hannah carried the cans in, she held them against her chest and got a coffee ground stain on her shirt. Not good at all! It takes Hannah between a half an hour and two hours to pick out clothes for the day. She always does it the night before and wears them to bed, but don't get me started, I let the little things go. If you have a typical kid, you might not consider that a little thing, but for Hannah it really is. Now she had to leave for the bus in the next 2 minutes. Of course, she insists on going to the bus stop way too early, but she thinks she is late if she doesn't get out of the house at least 15 minutes before the bus comes. The stop is right in front of our house, so it isn't like she has a long walk.
Anyway, when she saw the stain, she freaked out! She started screaming that she would never be able to pick something else out before the bus came, etc. I tried to tell her we could spray a little Awesome spray on it and wipe it with a damp washcloth and it would probably come out. She was having none of it. She started screaming, well, not really screaming, but it is hard to describe. It was more like a long, deep rumbling grunt of total frustration. I know the sound well because I have made it myself in regards to some of her antics! She ran to the wall and started to kick it, then she ran to the french doors that lead to the living room and kicked those a bunch of times (they have glass in them, luckily, she only kicked the wood on the bottom), then she started kicking the bottom of the front door sidelight window. The whole time, she was emitting the uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh sound! No damage was done, other than some of the color from the sole of her shoe making a mark on the french door. At this point, I was trying to figure out just how she figured that taking the time to kick three different spots in the house would help her find a new shirt and get to the bus stop on time! She then ran upstairs, grabbed a different shirt and left.
She wants me to buy her a large punching bag to hang in her room. She thinks this would help her let out her rage in an acceptable manner. I think it would, if she is be able to keep it together long enough to actually go to the room to punch it. I have been looking for a cheap one on Craig's List and have even tried to ask for one on Freecycle, but no luck as of yet. I don't think one of those little balloon type ones would be effective. I think she needs the big, heavy kind and I know they are pretty expensive. We'll see what happens with that.
That was the mini tantrum. A few hours later, Steven woke up and the real fireworks began! Last week, when he got paid, he had cashed his check, kept out $30 for his weekly spending money, and given me the envelope with the rest of the money. Out of that, I was supposed to keep $25 for myself, since I had loaned him $25 and pay his bills with the rest. On Saturday, Mike had taken the money, to pay the bills and anything left into Steven's bank account. We have an account that is in his name and Mike's and Steven isn't authorized to withdraw from it. Since he isn't great about saving, this is the only way for him to save to get his car fixed. Mike forgot to leave Steven's weekly $30 spending money. So, following in his sister's footsteps, Steven decided to freak out, also. He didn't kick anything. He just yelled and said all kinds of mean, untrue and irrational things to me. Let's highlight a few of the really lovely ones. "I want to see a deposit slip because I make all kinds of money and it all disappears once Dad gets it." "This is bull sh*t." "I work all week and have all my money taken away." I could go on for a while, but you get the picture.
This happened twice. After I accused him of being rude, disrespectful and ungrateful, which I'm sure he wasn't listening to, as he was still screaming, I told him to get out of the house. I really don't have to listen to that crap in my own home. He went outside for about 10 minutes and I saw one of his friends come over. Then he came back in and started up again with the exact same drivel. I said the exact same thing I said the first time and then just refused to engage. He went back out in front with his friend. I emailed Mike and he called me and helped me calm down because although I handle things like this all the time and don't usually get that upset, this time I did. I think that it has to do with the fact that I took such good care of this kid when he got his dog bite and surgery. While I feel that it is my job and privilege to do so, as his mother, and I am really happy to do it and don't expect any thank you or reward for doing it, I also don't feel I deserve to be treated like that!
I think Mike called Steven's cell phone and talked to him because after about 20 more minutes, he came in and apologized (not sure how sincere it was, but it wasn't nasty) and asked if I could get the money from the ATM and then take it out of his bank account. Funny thing is, that is what I was first trying to tell him I would do when he started screaming at me!
Okay, just to get this straight. We have never stolen money from him, even though he is convinced that we have. We have taken small amounts at times (about $20-30 a month, with his knowledge) to help pay for the large balance we still owe from his 2 1/2 years of substance abuse treatment. As a matter of fact, we have supported him since April 10th, when he had his surgery. This support included changing bandages, keeping medication records and making sure he actually took them on time, driving back and forth to various hospitals, 4 specialists, physical therapy and administering IV's 24 hours a day. Not to mention the monetary help and food we provided when he couldn't work for several weeks in February and March, after the dog bite. We have paid almost all of his medical copays, for 2 ER treatments, surgery, and therapy. We haven't asked for one red cent in rent. We paid 3 months of his car payment when he was out of work for 7 weeks, even though paying it caused us to have to put groceries on a credit card which will probably never be paid off in our lifetime. And WE are stealing from HIM? Are you kidding me???????
Okay, I'm done, but that felt really good! Not sure how much sense it all makes and I don't have the energy right now to proof read, so it is going to get posted, as is. Steven behaved the rest of the day, so did Hannah. All in all Steven has been WAY better than he used to be. If I compare the way he was one year ago and the way he is today, I can't believe the difference. That makes it a lot easier to stomach what happened today. A year ago, I would think he really meant all those mean things, but now I know that he is as grateful as he can be and controls his temper as well as he is capable of doing. At times, it is obvious that he has to work very hard to do that, but he is doing it consistently. Shauna now likes him again, most times anyway. A year ago, she would cry every day and ask me when he was moving out. He is a lot of fun to be around 80-90% of the time now, as opposed to 10% or less one year ago. I call that real progress!
Anyway, when she saw the stain, she freaked out! She started screaming that she would never be able to pick something else out before the bus came, etc. I tried to tell her we could spray a little Awesome spray on it and wipe it with a damp washcloth and it would probably come out. She was having none of it. She started screaming, well, not really screaming, but it is hard to describe. It was more like a long, deep rumbling grunt of total frustration. I know the sound well because I have made it myself in regards to some of her antics! She ran to the wall and started to kick it, then she ran to the french doors that lead to the living room and kicked those a bunch of times (they have glass in them, luckily, she only kicked the wood on the bottom), then she started kicking the bottom of the front door sidelight window. The whole time, she was emitting the uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh sound! No damage was done, other than some of the color from the sole of her shoe making a mark on the french door. At this point, I was trying to figure out just how she figured that taking the time to kick three different spots in the house would help her find a new shirt and get to the bus stop on time! She then ran upstairs, grabbed a different shirt and left.
She wants me to buy her a large punching bag to hang in her room. She thinks this would help her let out her rage in an acceptable manner. I think it would, if she is be able to keep it together long enough to actually go to the room to punch it. I have been looking for a cheap one on Craig's List and have even tried to ask for one on Freecycle, but no luck as of yet. I don't think one of those little balloon type ones would be effective. I think she needs the big, heavy kind and I know they are pretty expensive. We'll see what happens with that.
That was the mini tantrum. A few hours later, Steven woke up and the real fireworks began! Last week, when he got paid, he had cashed his check, kept out $30 for his weekly spending money, and given me the envelope with the rest of the money. Out of that, I was supposed to keep $25 for myself, since I had loaned him $25 and pay his bills with the rest. On Saturday, Mike had taken the money, to pay the bills and anything left into Steven's bank account. We have an account that is in his name and Mike's and Steven isn't authorized to withdraw from it. Since he isn't great about saving, this is the only way for him to save to get his car fixed. Mike forgot to leave Steven's weekly $30 spending money. So, following in his sister's footsteps, Steven decided to freak out, also. He didn't kick anything. He just yelled and said all kinds of mean, untrue and irrational things to me. Let's highlight a few of the really lovely ones. "I want to see a deposit slip because I make all kinds of money and it all disappears once Dad gets it." "This is bull sh*t." "I work all week and have all my money taken away." I could go on for a while, but you get the picture.
This happened twice. After I accused him of being rude, disrespectful and ungrateful, which I'm sure he wasn't listening to, as he was still screaming, I told him to get out of the house. I really don't have to listen to that crap in my own home. He went outside for about 10 minutes and I saw one of his friends come over. Then he came back in and started up again with the exact same drivel. I said the exact same thing I said the first time and then just refused to engage. He went back out in front with his friend. I emailed Mike and he called me and helped me calm down because although I handle things like this all the time and don't usually get that upset, this time I did. I think that it has to do with the fact that I took such good care of this kid when he got his dog bite and surgery. While I feel that it is my job and privilege to do so, as his mother, and I am really happy to do it and don't expect any thank you or reward for doing it, I also don't feel I deserve to be treated like that!
I think Mike called Steven's cell phone and talked to him because after about 20 more minutes, he came in and apologized (not sure how sincere it was, but it wasn't nasty) and asked if I could get the money from the ATM and then take it out of his bank account. Funny thing is, that is what I was first trying to tell him I would do when he started screaming at me!
Okay, just to get this straight. We have never stolen money from him, even though he is convinced that we have. We have taken small amounts at times (about $20-30 a month, with his knowledge) to help pay for the large balance we still owe from his 2 1/2 years of substance abuse treatment. As a matter of fact, we have supported him since April 10th, when he had his surgery. This support included changing bandages, keeping medication records and making sure he actually took them on time, driving back and forth to various hospitals, 4 specialists, physical therapy and administering IV's 24 hours a day. Not to mention the monetary help and food we provided when he couldn't work for several weeks in February and March, after the dog bite. We have paid almost all of his medical copays, for 2 ER treatments, surgery, and therapy. We haven't asked for one red cent in rent. We paid 3 months of his car payment when he was out of work for 7 weeks, even though paying it caused us to have to put groceries on a credit card which will probably never be paid off in our lifetime. And WE are stealing from HIM? Are you kidding me???????
Okay, I'm done, but that felt really good! Not sure how much sense it all makes and I don't have the energy right now to proof read, so it is going to get posted, as is. Steven behaved the rest of the day, so did Hannah. All in all Steven has been WAY better than he used to be. If I compare the way he was one year ago and the way he is today, I can't believe the difference. That makes it a lot easier to stomach what happened today. A year ago, I would think he really meant all those mean things, but now I know that he is as grateful as he can be and controls his temper as well as he is capable of doing. At times, it is obvious that he has to work very hard to do that, but he is doing it consistently. Shauna now likes him again, most times anyway. A year ago, she would cry every day and ask me when he was moving out. He is a lot of fun to be around 80-90% of the time now, as opposed to 10% or less one year ago. I call that real progress!
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Quote of the day
Me: "I need a bigger dishwasher, I don't think all this stuff is going to fit."
Steven: "You don't need to gain any weight, Mom."
Took me a couple of seconds to get it...little brat!
Steven: "You don't need to gain any weight, Mom."
Took me a couple of seconds to get it...little brat!
Saturday, May 9, 2009
Steven's finger update
Steven got his picc line taken out today! Yay, things are almost back to normal around here.
Sleeping Beauties
I guess that huge Italian dinner was too much for these two!
Steven, Wrigley, and Shauna
Steven, Wrigley, and ShaunaMonday, May 4, 2009
Steven's finger update
We went to the infectious disease doctor today and he said the picc line can be taken out this Saturday. Yay! No more antibiotics, no more nurses coming to the house!!! Well, the nurse still has to come twice before then, but we are almost finished! Plus, Steven can go back to work, starting Sunday.
The incision is healing nicely
He still cannot straighten his finger all the way and he still has a good amount of swelling.
The incision is healing nicely
He still cannot straighten his finger all the way and he still has a good amount of swelling.
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Minus one kid
Steven went to work with Mike this week. He called me today and told me about all his adventures in DC/Northern VA. He went fishing in the pond behind Mike's work. He was excited to find a new fishing pole for only $10, as well as a tackle box filled with tackle for only $10. He couldn't find our tackle box when he left. I forgot to ask him if he caught any fish!
Mike had a meeting in DC yesterday, so Steven went along. He went to several museums. I think he said the Museum of Natural History (maybe!) and for sure the Air and Space Museum. He also walked around DC, to the Washington Monument and the White House. He said the White House was particularly interesting because he thinks the President was coming home. He said three huge helicopters came, two hovered while the third landed. He also said the place was crawling with extra security and the snipers on the roof were all very visible. I wish we had all been there to see that, it would have been pretty cool.
Mike had a meeting in DC yesterday, so Steven went along. He went to several museums. I think he said the Museum of Natural History (maybe!) and for sure the Air and Space Museum. He also walked around DC, to the Washington Monument and the White House. He said the White House was particularly interesting because he thinks the President was coming home. He said three huge helicopters came, two hovered while the third landed. He also said the place was crawling with extra security and the snipers on the roof were all very visible. I wish we had all been there to see that, it would have been pretty cool.
Monday, April 27, 2009
Quote of the day
"You're my favorite furry orange friend"--Sung by Steven while he was petting Booty-Boy, our orange and white cat.
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Steven's hand update
We went back to the surgeon today and they took out Steven's stitches. It was pretty painful, unfortunately. Luckily, the nurse was pretty quick, taking out 22 stitches in only about 5 minutes. The doctor said he actually has less swelling than would be considered normal two weeks after surgery. He also said that his range of motion is better than would be considered normal, so it was all good news. He also confirmed that the dog had not nipped the tendons, so he can expect that he will eventually have a complete recovery. Thank God, since he will need full range of motion for his culinary career! The doctor advised him to keep working hard on the physical therapy and continue frequent visits with the infectious disease doctor. He needs a follow up appointment with the surgeon in 6 weeks.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Stuff and more stuff
Steven continues to slowly improve after his surgery. He has been to the physical therapist 4 times, which is still really painful for him, but he is sticking with it and doing the exercises. We went to see a lawyer today to, hopefully, get his medical bills paid. She said he has a very good case and she is going to ask another lawyer to join her on this case because he has a personal injury practice and has a lot of experience with dog bite suits. I'm not really thrilled about having to bring in a lawyer, but since the dog's owners don't want to help with the bills, we don't have a choice.
Janine is here, arriving several hours earlier than expected on Saturday. CUP was freaking out because he had to rush to get ready. He gave her a hard time about it, but the important thing is she got here safely and without any traffic problems! Mike, Jack, Janine, Steven, Hannah and I all went to Richmond Saturday night to see Chuck's band again. It was fun. Since it was a beautiful evening, they played outside on the patio and that was really nice.
I have a black and white shirt that I joke around with my mom about. I call it my "hot" shirt. At the restaurant, I told Mike that I had my hot shirt on and his reply was, "I have my compression stocking on." Wow, talk about a reminder of how old we are getting! When we were dating, we hung around with Chuck and Roni a lot. While we were at the concert, I told Mike that it reminded me of when we were dating because he smelled like beer and we were hanging around with Chuck and Roni!
I forgot to blog that another friend of Steven's was killed last week. He had two friends killed in an accident last summer (they were drunk and high) and now this friend was hit head-on by a drunk/high driver and killed instantly. I find it hard to believe that people still think it is fine to drive drunk or under the influence of drugs. As we were leaving the lawyer's office, Steven got a call from one of his friends who told him that another of their friends had committed suicide. How sad.
This morning Alex had to stay home for a little while because he had such a bad nose bleed and it wouldn't stop. Every time I take him to the doctor and tell her that he gets these terrible nose bleeds, she tells him not to pick his nose! Hello, he is 14 years old, he doesn't pick his nose! I'm going to take him in again and see if there is something else we can do to prevent this, besides banning the nose picking. When he gets these really bad bleeds, he can soak through several towels and lose a ton of blood, which can't be good. I wonder if we should just take him to the ER the next time it happens. Of course, it almost always happens in the middle of the night or early in the morning and sometimes he doesn't even tell me when it is happening because he doesn't want to bother me. Sometimes I see the tell tale blood splatters and figure it out that way. I always joke that if a murder is committed in our house and the police spray it with luminol, there is going to be blood all over the place from his bloody noses, as well as Hannah's! He does a pretty good job of cleaning the blood up, now that he is older, but sometimes he misses some.
Janine is here, arriving several hours earlier than expected on Saturday. CUP was freaking out because he had to rush to get ready. He gave her a hard time about it, but the important thing is she got here safely and without any traffic problems! Mike, Jack, Janine, Steven, Hannah and I all went to Richmond Saturday night to see Chuck's band again. It was fun. Since it was a beautiful evening, they played outside on the patio and that was really nice.
I have a black and white shirt that I joke around with my mom about. I call it my "hot" shirt. At the restaurant, I told Mike that I had my hot shirt on and his reply was, "I have my compression stocking on." Wow, talk about a reminder of how old we are getting! When we were dating, we hung around with Chuck and Roni a lot. While we were at the concert, I told Mike that it reminded me of when we were dating because he smelled like beer and we were hanging around with Chuck and Roni!
I forgot to blog that another friend of Steven's was killed last week. He had two friends killed in an accident last summer (they were drunk and high) and now this friend was hit head-on by a drunk/high driver and killed instantly. I find it hard to believe that people still think it is fine to drive drunk or under the influence of drugs. As we were leaving the lawyer's office, Steven got a call from one of his friends who told him that another of their friends had committed suicide. How sad.
This morning Alex had to stay home for a little while because he had such a bad nose bleed and it wouldn't stop. Every time I take him to the doctor and tell her that he gets these terrible nose bleeds, she tells him not to pick his nose! Hello, he is 14 years old, he doesn't pick his nose! I'm going to take him in again and see if there is something else we can do to prevent this, besides banning the nose picking. When he gets these really bad bleeds, he can soak through several towels and lose a ton of blood, which can't be good. I wonder if we should just take him to the ER the next time it happens. Of course, it almost always happens in the middle of the night or early in the morning and sometimes he doesn't even tell me when it is happening because he doesn't want to bother me. Sometimes I see the tell tale blood splatters and figure it out that way. I always joke that if a murder is committed in our house and the police spray it with luminol, there is going to be blood all over the place from his bloody noses, as well as Hannah's! He does a pretty good job of cleaning the blood up, now that he is older, but sometimes he misses some.
Friday, April 17, 2009
Catch up stuff
Steven is recovering nicely from his surgery. The incision is large and creepy looking (22 stitches), but it is healing really well. He had to start physical therapy 3 days after surgery, which was incredibly painful. To his credit, he actually has been doing the exercises at home, as the therapist told him to. I didn't expect that at all. The therapist was shocked when he went back on Day Two and had already improved tremendously!
Giving him the IV infusions at home isn't as bad as I thought it would be. We have the routine down pat now and it goes fairly quickly and smoothly. Steven is even beginning to be able to handle some of it himself, which was impossible at first because he couldn't use his hand. He has the IV's going for 9 hours a day. He is also taking one oral prescription in addition to his pain medication. I have to change his wound dressings, but that isn't as bad as I thought it would be, either.
Having him back at home has been okay, especially since he slept about 22 hours a day for the first 5 days or so! For the most part, he has been very nice and respectful, with a few minor exceptions, so that is good. He had a reaction to one of the IV meds, but they slowed the rate at which the medicine was infused and had him taking Benadryl a half hour before the meds started and that took care of the problem. In addition to the 3 physical therapy appointments this week, we also saw the infectious disease doctor, who is in charge of his medications. The home nurse has been to the house twice, but only has to come once a week from now on. She will check on him, change his picc line dressing and draw blood.
This is just a quickie post to keep my fans quiet, but I hope to post about his surgery/hospital experience soon!
Janine is coming to visit, again, tomorrow. She will be here for a little over a week and we are all looking forward to seeing her. She is bringing me some Autism Awareness ribbons that she made and is selling to raise money for Autism research. I meant to blog about this earlier, but never got the chance. If anyone would like to purchase a ribbon or ribbons, please let me know and I will put you in contact with Janine.
Giving him the IV infusions at home isn't as bad as I thought it would be. We have the routine down pat now and it goes fairly quickly and smoothly. Steven is even beginning to be able to handle some of it himself, which was impossible at first because he couldn't use his hand. He has the IV's going for 9 hours a day. He is also taking one oral prescription in addition to his pain medication. I have to change his wound dressings, but that isn't as bad as I thought it would be, either.
Having him back at home has been okay, especially since he slept about 22 hours a day for the first 5 days or so! For the most part, he has been very nice and respectful, with a few minor exceptions, so that is good. He had a reaction to one of the IV meds, but they slowed the rate at which the medicine was infused and had him taking Benadryl a half hour before the meds started and that took care of the problem. In addition to the 3 physical therapy appointments this week, we also saw the infectious disease doctor, who is in charge of his medications. The home nurse has been to the house twice, but only has to come once a week from now on. She will check on him, change his picc line dressing and draw blood.
This is just a quickie post to keep my fans quiet, but I hope to post about his surgery/hospital experience soon!
Janine is coming to visit, again, tomorrow. She will be here for a little over a week and we are all looking forward to seeing her. She is bringing me some Autism Awareness ribbons that she made and is selling to raise money for Autism research. I meant to blog about this earlier, but never got the chance. If anyone would like to purchase a ribbon or ribbons, please let me know and I will put you in contact with Janine.
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Worst dinner guests ever
Today Steven and his friend, Will, came over to pick up the last of Steven's furniture. Steven had already asked if he could come over for dinner because he was off work. The girls have been dying to spend some time with him, so I changed my plans so that I could stay home and cook. Will asked me when I was going to make brownies again, so I told him I would make them today and I invited him for dinner, too.
I made the brownies, regular and cream cheese swirl, and made Steven's favorite dinner, sweet and sour hot dogs. Well, Steven came over without Will, saying Will would be over later. About a half hour before dinner, I told Steven to call Will and get him over here. He called and, apparently, Will wouldn't be able to make it after all. When dinner was ready, Steven tells me that he just wants to take his home because he isn't hungry! Ugh, see what I mean about the worst dinner guests every? One doesn't show up and the other doesn't want to eat!
I wasn't angry, I actually thought it was a little funny and I'm used to things not going exactly as planned, so it didn't throw me off. The girls had a good time with Steven and so did Luke. The two boys played hockey in the driveway for quite a while. It was funny when Steven first came over because Luke, Hannah and Shauna all had so much to tell him, they kept all talking at the same time. I felt like a traffic cop, holding my hands up to two to be quiet while the third talked and then switching back and forth while this went on for quite some time!
When I took Steven home, Will was pulling in at the same time, so I got to "yell" at him for not showing up to dinner. He said he got "stuck" at his girl's house, but would make it up to me by coming over this weekend to help with yard work. We'll see how that turns out! Steven claims he will come one day to help, also, but I'm pretty sure I won't hold my breath.
I made the brownies, regular and cream cheese swirl, and made Steven's favorite dinner, sweet and sour hot dogs. Well, Steven came over without Will, saying Will would be over later. About a half hour before dinner, I told Steven to call Will and get him over here. He called and, apparently, Will wouldn't be able to make it after all. When dinner was ready, Steven tells me that he just wants to take his home because he isn't hungry! Ugh, see what I mean about the worst dinner guests every? One doesn't show up and the other doesn't want to eat!
I wasn't angry, I actually thought it was a little funny and I'm used to things not going exactly as planned, so it didn't throw me off. The girls had a good time with Steven and so did Luke. The two boys played hockey in the driveway for quite a while. It was funny when Steven first came over because Luke, Hannah and Shauna all had so much to tell him, they kept all talking at the same time. I felt like a traffic cop, holding my hands up to two to be quiet while the third talked and then switching back and forth while this went on for quite some time!
When I took Steven home, Will was pulling in at the same time, so I got to "yell" at him for not showing up to dinner. He said he got "stuck" at his girl's house, but would make it up to me by coming over this weekend to help with yard work. We'll see how that turns out! Steven claims he will come one day to help, also, but I'm pretty sure I won't hold my breath.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
More old photos
Luke (26 months) and Chelsea (26 months), 5/25/94
Jamie on her 8th Birthday! Steven (4) and Jeff Rimkus, 5/20/94
The whole family at Drew's First Communion, 4/30/94
Lukey, age 2, 7/22/94
Stevie, age 4, 7/22/94Friday, March 20, 2009
A moment of panic
I'm on my way out the door for California. While I was getting ready and watching the local news, they had a report that a pedestrian had been killed just blocks from Steven's new home. I had a few minutes of panic because Steven is always in that area, on his bike or on foot, since his car is inoperable. His bike is unsafe, no brakes, no lights, and probably no or few reflectors. The person was dead on the scene and the name wasn't being released. I called Steven's cell phone and got no answer. I called again and he answered. Whew!
He is fine, but actually was there last night and came upon the accident scene. He saw the body covered with a sheet. Thank God Steven is okay, but I feel so bad that someone was killed.
California, here I come!
He is fine, but actually was there last night and came upon the accident scene. He saw the body covered with a sheet. Thank God Steven is okay, but I feel so bad that someone was killed.
California, here I come!
Monday, March 16, 2009
Happy Birthday Steven Matthew!
Well, today is Steven's 19 birthday. I'm really thankful that he made it this far. It is so hard to believe that he isn't still the pudgy little 9 lb. 3 oz. baby I gave birth to. Then again, we have been through so much trauma and drama with him, it sometimes feels more like 40 years than 19!
I had to take him to his eye doctor appointment this morning, so I made him a batch of brownies last night. I also brought a stash of breakfast burritos and a pan of tamale pie, so he was pretty happy. He is going to hide the brownies from his housemates so he can have the whole pan to himself! He got new glasses, since he won't wear his contacts (takes to long to put them in and out and he doesn't have time. In other words, he is too lazy and never took the time to get fully used to them.) He was very good about getting only the things our insurance allows, so I only had to pay a $25 co-pay. I can't wait until he is fully on his own and can afford these things himself!
He did talk about going to school, though, which is good. He said he really likes the idea of going to the nearby community college for the summer semester and then transferring to the community college in Richmond that has a Culinary Arts program. I just don't quite know how that is going to be paid for. He certainly can't afford it and Mike and I can't afford to co-sign for any more loans. I know he wouldn't qualify for a loan on his own, so it is going to be an uphill battle for sure. The thing is, though, if he doesn't go to school, he is never going to make enough money. Even though they are teaching him to cook at his restaurant, he will never make more than $10 or $12 an hour as a cook around here. If he gets a culinary degree, he will have the opportunity to make a lot more money.
I had to take him to his eye doctor appointment this morning, so I made him a batch of brownies last night. I also brought a stash of breakfast burritos and a pan of tamale pie, so he was pretty happy. He is going to hide the brownies from his housemates so he can have the whole pan to himself! He got new glasses, since he won't wear his contacts (takes to long to put them in and out and he doesn't have time. In other words, he is too lazy and never took the time to get fully used to them.) He was very good about getting only the things our insurance allows, so I only had to pay a $25 co-pay. I can't wait until he is fully on his own and can afford these things himself!
He did talk about going to school, though, which is good. He said he really likes the idea of going to the nearby community college for the summer semester and then transferring to the community college in Richmond that has a Culinary Arts program. I just don't quite know how that is going to be paid for. He certainly can't afford it and Mike and I can't afford to co-sign for any more loans. I know he wouldn't qualify for a loan on his own, so it is going to be an uphill battle for sure. The thing is, though, if he doesn't go to school, he is never going to make enough money. Even though they are teaching him to cook at his restaurant, he will never make more than $10 or $12 an hour as a cook around here. If he gets a culinary degree, he will have the opportunity to make a lot more money.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Update
I'm being nagged by people from multiple states to update my blog. Thanks, I needed to be nagged because I haven't been blogging because I just haven't felt like it.
I've been keeping a notepad with things that I wanted to blog about, so I wouldn't forget. Now they all look really stupid and boring, which leaves me with almost nothing. Ugh.
I do, however, have an update on Steven's finger situation. We went to the doctor on Thursday (after I forgot about the appointment, overslept, and had to get ready in 14 minutes, which is a record for me!) and the new specialist gave us a lot of information. Number one, he told us that when the dog bit the finger, he got part of the tendon. That is something the first specialist (the one who was such a jerk) told us hadn't happened. This doctor demonstrated how he could tell and after that, it was pretty obvious. The good news is that, apparently, there is more than one tendon and the one that was damaged is a secondary one. This does explain why Steven is still having trouble bending the finger fully. I'm not sure how that is going to affect him long term, yet.
By Thursday, the antibiotic had started to work and the swelling was starting to go down. The doctor said that Steven has about a 10-20% chance of needing surgery. He said it is a good sign that the antibiotic is working, but also, at his young age, his body is strong enough to appear to be doing better while still on the antibiotic, but as soon as he stops taking it, there is a chance that it will just flair up again. If that happens, he will have to have the surgery and IV antibiotics. He has to go back to have it checked again while I'm in California, so that should be interesting. I'm going to make CUP go in with him because Steven will never come out with an accurate description of what the doctor said.
The appointment was actually pretty funny because when we had gone to Drew's surgeon, Dr. W., on Tuesday, he told us a bunch of stories about how things used to be when he was the only surgeon here. I loved the stories, but Steven didn't appreciate them because they cut into his social time (or maybe it was nap time). When the new specialist, Dr. C., asked what Dr. W. had said, Steven blurted out, "Oh, nothing really, he just told us a bunch of stories that had nothing to do with my finger." Dr. C., apparently knowing the much older and very friendly Dr. W. very well, burst out laughing!
The only other thing worth blogging about is that I got a really nice thank you note from Janine. That was very sweet of you, thanks, Janine! Of course, I got it a couple of weeks ago and I'm just getting around to blogging about it. I really have been slacking lately.
Also, if I comment occasionally on your blog and I haven't been doing it lately, sorry. I'm also behind on my blog reading and even when I do run over to check things out, I'm usually in a hurry and don't leave a message.
I've been keeping a notepad with things that I wanted to blog about, so I wouldn't forget. Now they all look really stupid and boring, which leaves me with almost nothing. Ugh.
I do, however, have an update on Steven's finger situation. We went to the doctor on Thursday (after I forgot about the appointment, overslept, and had to get ready in 14 minutes, which is a record for me!) and the new specialist gave us a lot of information. Number one, he told us that when the dog bit the finger, he got part of the tendon. That is something the first specialist (the one who was such a jerk) told us hadn't happened. This doctor demonstrated how he could tell and after that, it was pretty obvious. The good news is that, apparently, there is more than one tendon and the one that was damaged is a secondary one. This does explain why Steven is still having trouble bending the finger fully. I'm not sure how that is going to affect him long term, yet.
By Thursday, the antibiotic had started to work and the swelling was starting to go down. The doctor said that Steven has about a 10-20% chance of needing surgery. He said it is a good sign that the antibiotic is working, but also, at his young age, his body is strong enough to appear to be doing better while still on the antibiotic, but as soon as he stops taking it, there is a chance that it will just flair up again. If that happens, he will have to have the surgery and IV antibiotics. He has to go back to have it checked again while I'm in California, so that should be interesting. I'm going to make CUP go in with him because Steven will never come out with an accurate description of what the doctor said.
The appointment was actually pretty funny because when we had gone to Drew's surgeon, Dr. W., on Tuesday, he told us a bunch of stories about how things used to be when he was the only surgeon here. I loved the stories, but Steven didn't appreciate them because they cut into his social time (or maybe it was nap time). When the new specialist, Dr. C., asked what Dr. W. had said, Steven blurted out, "Oh, nothing really, he just told us a bunch of stories that had nothing to do with my finger." Dr. C., apparently knowing the much older and very friendly Dr. W. very well, burst out laughing!
The only other thing worth blogging about is that I got a really nice thank you note from Janine. That was very sweet of you, thanks, Janine! Of course, I got it a couple of weeks ago and I'm just getting around to blogging about it. I really have been slacking lately.
Also, if I comment occasionally on your blog and I haven't been doing it lately, sorry. I'm also behind on my blog reading and even when I do run over to check things out, I'm usually in a hurry and don't leave a message.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Steven's doctor appointment
I took Steven to the surgeon today to find out what we need to do about his finger. This is the surgeon who did Drew's collar bone surgery and I love him. He is so nice and he explains everything without using any doctor words.
Anyway, he said that he wants Steven to see another surgeon, who only does hand surgeries. He said that he can take care of it, but he doesn't do that all the time and since it is really serious, he would rather that Steven see someone who does it all the time. He did tell us that if we don't like the other guy or aren't happy with him for any reason, he would certainly take care of him. He would just rather make sure Steven gets the best care possible.
He confirmed the infection and said there were two possibilities that he could think of. The first was that he might be able to ride out the infection with lots of antibiotics, but since that could make it even worse and the infection could get into the bone, he didn't want to make that call. The second is that he would need surgery to "fillet open" (yes, he said that!) the finger and insert a tube along the length of it. The tube would go in near the top of the finger and come out in or near the palm. It would have a drain at the bottom and Steven would need to stay in the hospital for 3 or 4 days, so that the nurses can monitor it and regularly flush it out. Gross and yuck and ouch!
Steven's health insurance coverage runs out on April 1st, so we have to get this over with quickly! He is thinking about signing up for school, which would extend his coverage. I would love to see him going to school (for culinary arts), but I'm not sure he is ready for that at this point. To me, there is no point in going to school if you aren't going to take it seriously and I'm not sure Steven is at that point, yet. He will have to work full time or more than full time and go to school full time. He will also have to lay off the substances and concentrate on school. So, we'll see how that goes, I guess.
Anyway, he said that he wants Steven to see another surgeon, who only does hand surgeries. He said that he can take care of it, but he doesn't do that all the time and since it is really serious, he would rather that Steven see someone who does it all the time. He did tell us that if we don't like the other guy or aren't happy with him for any reason, he would certainly take care of him. He would just rather make sure Steven gets the best care possible.
He confirmed the infection and said there were two possibilities that he could think of. The first was that he might be able to ride out the infection with lots of antibiotics, but since that could make it even worse and the infection could get into the bone, he didn't want to make that call. The second is that he would need surgery to "fillet open" (yes, he said that!) the finger and insert a tube along the length of it. The tube would go in near the top of the finger and come out in or near the palm. It would have a drain at the bottom and Steven would need to stay in the hospital for 3 or 4 days, so that the nurses can monitor it and regularly flush it out. Gross and yuck and ouch!
Steven's health insurance coverage runs out on April 1st, so we have to get this over with quickly! He is thinking about signing up for school, which would extend his coverage. I would love to see him going to school (for culinary arts), but I'm not sure he is ready for that at this point. To me, there is no point in going to school if you aren't going to take it seriously and I'm not sure Steven is at that point, yet. He will have to work full time or more than full time and go to school full time. He will also have to lay off the substances and concentrate on school. So, we'll see how that goes, I guess.
Monday, March 9, 2009
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