Wednesday, July 16, 2008

I forgot I knew that

Now to the missing Hannah story. I wasn't really worried about her being missing because she only goes to one of her three friend's houses when she disappears, all within a couple of blocks of our house. I just realized today, though, that I ran off to the vet and left Shauna home alone. She didn't want to go to the vet with us, she was too afraid the dog would die, I think, and insisted on staying home. She is 10 going on 25 and more than capable on staying home by herself for a short time, but I would have been a little nervous about it, had I realized she was alone!

Anyway, back to the real story. When we got back from the vet, Hannah was home and I took her into my bedroom for a talk. I asked why she had gone out when she was grounded. She said that she was sorry, but she only went out to go jogging and she didn't know she couldn't do that when she was grounded. It is true that in the past I have let her go out jogging once in a while because she gets so hyper when she doesn't exercise. So I said well you know that leaving the house without permission is not allowed, so what about that. She said, with all sincerity, "I knew that was a rule, but I forgot I knew that." Wow, that just screams FAS to me! I have to admit that even with all the research I've done on FAS, the fact that these kids can actually forget a rule just like that, even though they've been told a thousand times, was hard for me to grasp. It wasn't until I recently started reading the blogs of other foster/adoptive parents with kids with FAS, who are doing the same thing, that it really hit home for me. This also was the first time that Hannah phrased it like that. She usually just says "I forgot", which always strikes me as just an excuse. I'm impressed that she realized that she did now the rule, but forgot that. Since she was honest with me and didn't scream or yell, I only gave her an extra chore as punishment and didn't add to her grounding. Today, she asked if she could go jogging!

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